Hypocrite...

I've written before about how we are all hypocrites. There is nobody out there who is completely pure. The Good Place (yes philosophy from a TV show) highlighted it when they showed that nobody gets into the good place because we are all doing something with bad consequences even if they are unintended.

I drive an electric car. Great! No gasoline! But bad lithium batteries. I use solar power on my house. Great! No coal power plants! Bad, there are those batteries again! (and other mined materials, more than just one)

I wear inexpensive clothing that I know is from places where the workers are paid less than the US wage. Boo! But, often it's a higher wage than other jobs in that area, so yay?

We are going to a Timbers game tonight. We gave up our season tickets a couple of years ago in the wake of the sexual harassment scandals around the Thorns and then hiring a coach for the Timbers that had in the past made some pretty sexist comments with a little light joking about domestic violence. To us this meant that the team owner had learned nothing from what had happened and we were out.

HOWEVER... the owner also did a lot of advance women's soccer in America. If it weren't for his contributions the NWSL might not have gotten the strong foothold that it did. He did a lot of good for women's soccer. I can acknowledge both. The good does not cancel out the damage, but it does make it complicated for people to say TERRIBLE or GREAT.

Now, for me the coach hire was the final straw where I was already teetering. But we still love the team itself. We've been fans for a long time. Tonight is the 50th Anniversary game (Not been fans THAT long, but for a long time) and so we are going. We are also going to a game later in the season where they are honoring one of my favorite players. Part of what makes it easier for me to stomach is that they already have my money. When we cancelled the season tickets they had already gathered payment and it was non refundable except in form of a credit. At the time the Thorns sale hadn't been finalized so we were able to use part of it for that season, but the rest has just been sitting there. I'm not giving him more money, I'm just using the money of mine he already has.

I also won't buy new gear. Though I almost caved with the 5oth Anniversary Kit. Again, I love the team. We still watch them on TV. I just don't love the owner. But I haven't yet hated on the owner enough to walk away from the team like I did the 49ers and the Blazers at different times. Though it's been close. It's hard to separate the owner from the players and the team from the coach. Though to be fair, the coach apologized and there hasn't been anything dicey from him in a lot of years. People are allowed to fuck up and then get better.

But...

It's getting harder and harder with all of my entertainment to draw those lines. As more and more corporations and people bend the knee or gleefully follow the current president I am left looking at TV, streaming, football teams, FIFA (though, let's face it it's been corrupt as long as I've been watching soccer), movies, actors, writers and on and on and wondering what do I keep and what do I walk away from? If I drop CBS/Paramount+ because of the bribe and Ellison and Skydance I lose Drag Race and if I drop them because of Ellison do I also drop Michigan Football because Ellison the elder is a booster of means? And let's face it, I watched the commercials last year, MOST of the fan base and the booster class are not people I would hang with.

But...

I'm a hypocrite. I will drop some things and not others. I already know that. I will also not be able to fully justify why The New York Times is a fuck no but reading Jamelle Bouie is still okay. Or why I dropped Amazon shopping but kept the TV streaming. I still watch Netflix for the queer comics it supports and other shows but I also know they platform transphobes which is why I dropped The Atlantic. Not that they supported queer comedy, the other part. The best I will tell you is....because. I could give you reasons, the shows I watch are interesting, the people I support on those platforms are inline with my sensibilities but it's all just hypocrisy on one level.

And I made peace with the fact that we are all hypocrites in certain areas a long long time ago.

The best I can do is the best I am willing to do. I could drop everything that trump touches. I could stop watching, reading, listening to, following, anyone that touches the things that he touches. And that might make me a better person. But as the authoritarian creep takes over it's getting harder and harder to do. So I will just keep making judgement calls on when it feels worse to watch, listen, partake, than it would feel to give it up.

It's the best we can do. All of us.

I would say don't beat yourself up too much if you still like art/entertainment by people you wouldn't like. But also, question yourself as to if it's worth it to you. And be willing to understand that you might just be a little bit of a hypocrite as well. And then keep that in mind when you are judging others.

None of us are pure.
All of us can do better.
But do your best and don't beat yourself up.

I know it's not really satisfying. But it's the best I've got right now.