Shameless...

I blame the church.

I mean, you all could have guessed that right? You don't even know what I'm going to write about but you could have guessed that I blame the church. If I were going to have a headstone it could be the inscription. Here Lies Denise, She Blames the Church.

But I do. I blame the church.

Specifically this time it's related to my post from earlier in the week about how we don't protect our girls. Larry Summers has resigned from Harvard and says that he's very ashamed of his messages with Epstein.

He's ashamed.

Insert eyeroll here.

You all know I don't do guilt. At least not for long. Guilt should be an actionable emotion. If you are feeling guilty about something that means you should stop doing it. Don't do things that make you feel guilty. It's just that simple.

Shame is what happens when someone else finds out that you were doing something wrong. If you are ashamed it means you were doing something that made you feel guilty, you didn't stop doing it and you were caught. Now you are ashamed.

And here's the thing, I don't think Larry Summers felt any guilt at all when he was emailing with Epstein seeking advice on how to sleep with someone he was mentoring. Ten years ago. When he would have been 60 and was at Harvard where the person he was mentoring would have been at best AT BEST in her early 20s. I don't think he felt any guilt at all. Just frustration that he couldn't get her in bed.

But now he says he's ashamed. Because we all know he was exchanging texts with a sex trafficker right up to the week he was arrested. For the second time. They all already knew what he was, aside from very well connected so his first case ended in a "now, Jeffrey..." But still, they knew. I don't think he felt guilt while it was happening but now says he's ashamed because we all know how disgusting he is.

He's as ashamed as Cee Lo Green was when he pleaded no contest to giving a woman ecstasy and got 3 years of probation. I mean, the original charge was rape but probation for a drug charge is good right? I'm sure he learned a lesson. The lesson being that if someone is unconscious it's not rape because they aren't really even there. That's what he tweeted out after the case. Along with a few other things that showed he didn't believe he did anything wrong. No shame because there was no problem.

He's as ashamed as Louis CK performing in Saudi Arabia for tens of thousands of dollars whining about how he's been cancelled all for a little sexual harassment. He's as ashamed as Harvey Weinstein saying he's confused as to why he was sentenced to jail, that a lot of men and women in this country are confused now as to what is acceptable behavior. I mean, rape is pretty unacceptable, Harv, just so you know.

He's as ashamed as the father of the dumpster rapist was when he complained that having to register as a sex offender for 20 years was a steep price to pay for 20 minutes of action. Because the girl he raped will be fine, I mean she was unconscious so no harm no foul right? What a way to ruin a promising swimming career.

They are all so ashamed.

Which is to say, not ashamed so much as pissed or possibly embarrassed that they got caught. Confused that there was any sort of consequence to pay. That it wasn't just what they had always done, and would continue to always do.

So why do I blame the church?

Because boys will be boys.

Because it's not up to men to be in control of themselves.

Because women are just too much temptation to resist.

Because it's always up to the woman to be in control of everybody's sexual urges. Even when the woman in question isn't a woman at all but a girl. She should never have been unconscious around Cee Lo Green or Dumpster Rapist. Or needed a movie role from Harvey. Or talked to Louis CK about, well anything. And she for sure shouldn't have been young and attractive around Larry Summers.

That's the lesson that I got growing up. And not just me. Any girl raised in the conservative church got it. We were supposed to be chaste for our own salvation, yes, but we also had to make sure we weren't tempting our brothers in Christ with our clavicles showing, or that inch above our knees which somehow would make them forget all of their bible verses. Or go swimming in a two piece bathing suit because everyone knows that's basically lingerie and how dare you.

And it's not just the church, it's the reach of the church that has made it pervasive. School dress codes are all about monitoring what girls wear so as not to be a distraction to the boys. Apparently boys cannot learn in the presence of a spaghetti strap or a belly button. And maybe that's true. Maybe it does drive them to distraction. Well, then teach them some self control. Stop policing what girls wear as if that's the problem with boy's self control.

Girls in conservative churches are responsible for their own sexuality and the sexuality of every male within site. Men can't help it They are visual creatures. They get impure thoughts. You have to make sure you aren't tempting them.

Though somehow these weak minded motherfuckers who can't hold it together in view of a bare shoulder are also supposed to be the leaders of the church and society and we women should defer to them. While also making sure we don't tempt them. Or distract them.

I blame the church.

Teach boys to control themselves. Teach them that they are the ones in control of themselves. That they don't touch without permission. Even if she's passed out in a two piece bathing suit. Maybe if we started treating our boys like they should be in control of themselves we would stop having so many men who weren't.

I don't think Larry Summers is ashamed of what he did. I think he's ashamed that we all know what he did. And there is a difference.

I hope the files are released and we see consequences for a lot more people who should have been fucking ashamed of themselves. I hope people go to jail. I hope people really are cancelled. I hope we remember that they are the ones who should be ashamed, not the girls that were trafficked.

Let's remember who the victims in those files are.

Shut down anyone who tries to tell you that those young "women" knew what they were doing. Because that's coming. The Jezebel defense.

I blame the church.